Thank you for adding this to the mix. You are right; parents should be included in the problem and the solution–big time. I suppose I didn’t talk about that because if I began I would never stop. Being a parent is a tough job. You want to encourage and support the best that is in your children, but you are not certain where the line is between effective motivation, and smothering your child’s self discovery.

My parents hoped for the best in me, but they didn’t actively motivate me in ways that helped my development. I was probably a bit of a mystery and a source of irritation to my parents, so I understand how difficult it may have been for them to get a handle on how to effectively engage me. Children are all so different, and they arrive without instruction manuals .

Perhaps parenting should be taught in school so that the next generation of parents will be able to play their part more effectively.

Again, thanks,
John

I speak to high school students a few times a year. I spoke to one group of students that were so sharp that I wanted to sit and listen to them. Then, I go across town to another school and I’m distressed after speaking because I know that so many of them are going to struggle. There is a flaw in the system but the parents must be a part of the solution.

Thanks for the post

Thank you for bringing that to everyone’s attention. I agree with you that positive alternatives and living examples are far more powerful than “corrections” to the negative. We can live with gentleness, awareness, and kindness, in ways that are also strong.

Rachel’s Challenge is a quest we should all take up in our own way. Perhaps this link will inspire a few people to learn more about this, and to pass it on.

Thanks again,
John

I just learned today about the program “Rachel’s Challenge,” inspired by Rachel Scott, the first student to die at Colombine High School, who had written about and demonstrated the power of kindness toward others – sort of a pay it forward, do something nice for someone, they do something nice for someone, etc. Her father has spearheaded the creation of a program that goes into schools and inspires kids to take Rachel’s challenge of proactively reaching out to others with kindness and compassion. I like this idea because it offers something really positive as opposed to anti-bullying programs. I think anti-bullying is valuable, but teaching the opposite, something positive, actually begins to change the mindset and the system – similarly to what you’re calling for. Appealing to kids’ softer sides, encouraging vulnerability rather than aggression. Anyway, thought you might be interested.

Linda

Read more from Linda Wolf (Insanely Serene) here… Authenticity: My Guest Post on Naked in Eden

Thanks for your great comment. There are so many stories from people who have bad memories of their school years. They have either been damaged in some way or they have not stimulated their personal genius because of the mundane industrial revolution era approach to education. I absolutely agree with you that we need to change the archaic, as you say, “read, write, ‘rithmetic” method of education.

Students are people first. That sounds a bit silly to say I guess, but it seems that the school systems have forgotten that. Students are people. They are not computers or robotic production machines. Students are emotional creatures, and those emotions either empower or subdue their personal genius and creativity. We need to educate with a respect for those emotions, and to teach self-understanding to students. If we can do that we can then get a better handle on how to structure a curriculum to serve and develop the whole student.

This can come together a step at a time, but we need to actually take those steps starting with step one. And step one might be to include a mandatory “emotional awareness and self-understanding” class throughout the entire grade school and high school years.

If we did that, children would grow up with a gradually improved understanding of themselves and their unique aptitudes and interests. It would go a long way to enabling them to take a fuller advantage of the curriculum, and it would help to defuse much of the emotional blocks–both social and academic–that students encounter in their educational journey.

Just this one change–if it is done right–would have a substantial positive effect on the percentage of students graduating, the quality of their offering to society, and the personal balance they experience in their lives and relationships. Can you imagine how that can affect the quality of a society, and of a country?

We need to change the educational system for our children. They deserve to be fully developed, and the future they will create should reflect their creative potential rather than their regret and disgust.

Best,
John