Top 10 Ways to Seduce Yourself

Seduction is a big part of life for us mortals.

Seduction is in our genes. We’re programmed to seek satisfaction but when we talk about satisfying our seductive desires, most of us automatically think of sexual seduction.

And sexual seduction is powerful stuff for sure. Is there anyone out there who has not fallen under the intoxicating spell of some god or goddess who has targeted us in their sexual sights?

But sexual gratification is not seduction’s main target. Believe it or not, we mostly seduce ourselves and it has nothing to do with sex.

Why do we Seduce Ourselves?

We seduce ourselves because we can, and because we get instant gratification from it. We have more choices than say, squirrels, because we are more intelligent than squirrels, but it seems that we haven’t learned to choose wisely.

Instead, we are probably the most gullible creature on the planet. We will believe almost any promise of satisfaction — completely ignoring the price we must pay for it — as long as it satisfies our immediate desires. To that end, we often transform our world view into a short-sighted, slick and slippery slope; a temporary place that works for us only as long as we keep finding new ground to stand on, and new desires to quench.

It doesn’t sound like there is much of a future in that does it? You would think we’d get the message, but apart from being gullible, we are also tenacious. We just hate to give up on the path of least resistance, and so we keep enticing ourselves forward.

How to Seduce Yourself

Here then are my top 10 ways to seduce yourself:

  1. It’s not your fault: Accepting blame is too judgemental. Abdicate ownership of your circumstances and they’ll improve by themselves.
  2. There’s plenty of time: Sure it’s important, but it can wait. It’ll still be here tomorrow and so will you.
  3. You don’t need to say “I love you:” They already know it.
  4. You’re better than them: Most people can’t see how wonderful you are because they are not capable of it. Don’t waste your time on them.
  5. You never have to say you’re sorry: Apologizing for hurting someone only aggravates the wound. Let sleeping dogs lie; they will soon forget.
  6. Happiness can wait: There’s money to be made. The more money you make today, the happier you’ll be tomorrow.
  7. The simple life is for simple people: You are capable of more than that. Get as much as you can, as fast as you can. The more you acquire, the better you’ll feel.
  8. You don’t have to be happy at your job: You just have to be good at it so that you can progress — into more of the same.
  9. Your relationship is just fine: Power games and emotional manipulation are perfectly normal and healthy.
  10. Don’t listen to that small voice within: It doesn’t know what it is talking about. It’s just your false sense of guilt trying to sabotage you.

Now, I know that I have seduced and deceived myself in so many more ways than this, but this is all I can think of right now. Perhaps I am trying to forget the rest. After all, they aren’t really that important are they :-)?

Over to you now!

9 thoughts on “Top 10 Ways to Seduce Yourself

  1. Miche - Serenity Hacker

    This is my first time here, and your list really sums up some key ways we seduce ourselves without even realizing it. Breaking through such seduction is important, but not always easy work as change is usually always needed after. Thanks for sharing this reminder… it’s funny how we may know these things for a time, make changes, then later fall into the very same seduction!!

    Thanks for sharing this!

    Cheers,
    Miche 🙂

  2. John Rocheleau Post author

    Miche,

    Hi there, and thank you for commenting. I went to you site and I enjoyed the experience. I’ll return for more.

    You are so right when you say that breaking through the seduction is not easy work. That’s why the word seduction fits better than calling it an error in judgement. We can see errors because they are illuminated by the light of reason, but when we are seduced, even when we do it to ourselves, we are mesmerized — and reason? Well, reason takes a holiday. 🙂

    Best,
    John

  3. Walter

    Your post is very different, in fact you have expressed your unique thoughts about the subject matter. Though I want to disagree on some aspects, I accept my ignorance on this fact. 🙂

  4. John Rocheleau Post author

    Hi Walter,

    You are absolutely correct; I have expressed a purposely narrowed perspective to highlight a particular angle. There are many other ways to look at this that would be more appropriate for some.

    It’s a bit of an offbeat take on the subject, but I’m a bit of an offbeat guy at times 🙂

    Best,
    John

  5. Ben King

    True satisfaction comes from within. I have recently taken up meditation and it allows you to appreciate and better understand what you have, and less inclined to seek gratification in less important things…!

  6. Finding Happiness

    Ha ha.. Guilty of pretty much everything in that list, at one time or another! Wait a second.. what am I saying? It may have been a slip of tongue. Not my fault at all 🙂

  7. Robin

    With double-digit unemployment (and expected to get worse) it shouldn’t matter if you hate the job you have, or not. YOU HAVE A JOB. I don’t like my job, but I’m putting food on the table and medicine in the cabinet. So no, you DO NOT have to be happy at your job, and yes it will lead more to the same – food on the table, gas in the tank, medicine in the cabinet. Most people don’t like their jobs, but they pay the bills. We don’t all have the luxury of chasing after a job we love, who would clean the toilets otherwise?

  8. John Rocheleau Post author

    Hi Robin,

    When I implied that a person should be happy at their job, I meant that they should or at least should try to be happy at their job–whatever job they have–even cleaning toilets. We have choices regarding how we relate to our work. The majority of people can greatly improve their level of job satisfaction by changing their attitude before they consider changing their job. That is what point #8 is about.

    For a further look at both sides of this question of raising job satisfaction by either changing your attitude toward your work or finding new work, have a look at: Is Your Job a Highway to Personal Development or Despair?.

    And if you’re in a people business–and who isn’t really–here is an article on job satisfaction that deals with how to relate effectively with people in the workplace while also enjoying the process and deriving personal satisfaction at the end of the day.

    We have choices, and they are not all black and white. I have held all types of positions in my life, done all sorts of work that on the surface may not appear rewarding, but I have learned long ago that it is all about relationship; your relationship to yourself (how good do you feel about yourself?), to your workmates, to your customers, and to the “stuff”; the things that you do at work. We get to choose how we relate to these aspects of work–and that can change everything, even if you are still cleaning toilets; and I have cleaned a few in my time (someone has to, right?)

    🙂
    John

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