Be True to Yourself


Have you ever had a deep and secret urge to be totally you — to let the persona drop?

That call to be genuine regardless of consequences feels somehow dangerous. It threatens to overthrow the order. Still, it tugs at you from some poorly lit place in your psyche.

Some of us are not living genuinely. Our lives are not an authentic expression of our true nature.

Why do we do it? We compromise and live false lives, appeasing someone, or some concept, that would not even be part of our life if we were to live genuinely. What sense does that make?

If this describes you in any way, your problem may be rooted in one of your greatest strengths — your sensitivity.

Is your sensitivity a liability?

Highly sensitive people are notorious for abdicating control to others that just happen into their lives. They do not want to hurt anyone because they know what it is like to be hurt. That causes sensitive people to acquiesce, regardless of how it will affect their own life.

They transfer their awareness and caring to others. They can then safely apply it without triggering, or having to deal with their own emotional pain. Well, that’s the unconscious plan anyway.

That misplaced caring causes highly sensitive people to forfeit their lives in preference for their perceived usefulness to others.

Ask yourself this: “what do I offer others, if I have never really given to myself?” What do you have to share that is genuine?

There is a secret spot deep within your psyche

This is the place where your true nature resides. No matter how much you bury it in perceived good intent and just causes, it remains strong. It impatiently waits for you to recognize and honor it with your actions.

Until you do that, you will never be truly free, and you will never to be truly yourself. No matter how good your intentions for others are, you will not reach your potential unless you first live for yourself.

Regardless of your spiritual beliefs, the life that you are living now is the one you have to deal with. The power is always in the present moment. You cannot afford to wait for tomorrow, or next year, or for the next life, to live authentically.

This is not about right or wrong, successful or unsuccessful. It is about living your life in the way your spirit wants.

Is it practical? It might not be when judged by your present perspective, but it could be when viewed through your vision for the future.

You could come up with good reasons to leave things as they are, if you want to. You may be right, or you may be wrong. There is much fear associated with change, especially changes like these. There are also deeply ingrained habits that you might need to break. Lifestyles are difficult to change, but if you are unfulfilled what alternative do you have?

Is the prospect of change worse than the thought of remaining in the same situation for the balance of your life?

There is no time other than the present

If you do not act in some way, no matter how small — right now — you will continue to forfeit a good portion of your life.

It is important to be clear with yourself why you want to create a more genuine expression of your nature. The only thing left to do then is to take action. The how though, can be a bit nebulous.

It might help to think about changing in small increments. You could take actions on desires one at a time. Maybe you have always felt musical or artistic, and you have some talent at that, but never the time. You could make the time, a step at a time.

Or perhaps you are so entrenched in the wrong life that the only way to be genuine is to do a 180. If that is the case, so be it.

Do whatever it takes to ensure that the others in your life understand your need and desire to change. You do not have to compromise. It is your life. And that life will be all the richer for your new directions. You will have even more to share, and the sharing will be more powerful because it will come from a genuine place.

What secret lifestyle do you hold within you — and should it remain secret?

Over to you now…

6 thoughts on “Be True to Yourself

  1. Bruce Keener

    Another well-thought-out article, John!

    I can’t speak for everyone, but at least with me I sometimes feel that there is a “secret mission” or purpose buried within me, and finding it is like finding that needle in the haystack. Is it really there, or is that just my imagination? Hard to say, but certainly you have reminded me that I need to try harder to find out. Life is too short, dontcha know.

  2. John R. Post author

    Thanks Bruce,

    I know how it feels to have an inner mission statement that we can’t hear well enough to consciously articulate. That “small voice within” whispers hints to us all the time though. The more we listen and take action on these fragments, the clearer the voice becomes.

    Yeah; don’t I know it. Life is short. We may as well do it while we can 🙂

  3. guruglenn

    Well John, were you thinking of me when you penned this beauty. I am a lifetime INFJ HSP that gave up my own identity to those around me. I meditated for 25 years and then about six years ago I did a 180 and let go of everything I knew. The result: – my novel “Lotus Petal is being published and I am being cradled in the arms of everlasting love.

  4. John Rocheleau Post author

    Glenn: Of course I was thinking of you 🙂 .

    I’ll have to look into that novel of yours. The path of those who meditate seriously, often takes them away from meditation; even into despair and depression as part of their learning and releasing journey. Perhaps your story is another, less dramatic, variation on that.


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